Joe Picasso's

Excellent rooms!! Property is great!! One of our best vacations.

The room was really nice, there are small things that can be improved but overall nice.

The only 5-star thing is the price After a 10-hour flight, we checked into our supposedly 5-star hotel room and found it dirty and stained. When we asked to change rooms, Matt at the desk was incredibly sassy and dismissive. Customer service was so poor, you’d genuinely get better treatment in a hostel. A manager reviewed the room, only for someone else to call and say, “stains don’t make it dirty.HA. Sorry, what? Since when are stains acceptable in a 5-star hotel? Send a housekeeper in and clean it! Eventually, they agreed to move us and gave us a small resort credit. We were told the new room wasn’t ready and that they’d text us. Surprise, surprise — no text. At 5pm, we went back to the desk. We were taken to view a room, only to discover it was someone else’s room. We eventually chose another, collected new keys seven floors downstairs and carried six pieces of 20–30kg luggage ourselves, only to discover the keys didn’t work. One of us stayed with the luggage while the other went downstairs. The staff member asked why we didn’t just dial zero for help. BECAUSE WE COULDN’T GET INTO THE ROOM TO USE THE PHONE. Finally, we got in and discovered NO WATER. The engineer eventually arrived, saying he’d been told the water wasn’t hot, not that there was no water at all. Even he couldn’t believe it. At check-in, we heard another couple having issues on check out. We should have taken that as our warning and ran for the hills. Things go wrong, but how you handle it matters.